Why one must be assertive?
In all spheres of our professional lives, we have to be assertive. It is a competitive world today. One faces many challenges in one’s work arena. Also one has to deal with all kinds of people. Some may be helpful and cooperative and others may not be so helpful. It may not be very easy to convince some people. At times your views may not be acceptable to the other person. Only if one is assertive can one get one’s way.

Difference between assertiveness and aggressive
When one is aggressive one tends to be rude and can also use abuse language. Being assertive, on the other hand, means being polite and firm. If one is rude one gets nowhere. Nobody likes an abusive person.

Sweet conversation appeals to a person. A person will be convinced if he or she is spoken to politely, but firmly. He or she must feel that other person is not forcing him or her to do anything, but giving him or her choice to decide whatever is best for him or her.

A firm “Yes” or ” No” can mean a lot in one’s association with other people. How one says it matters.

Advantages of being assertive

• One is able to get one’s way.
• One can convince the other person very emphatically.
• Business deals can often be settled.
• Reflects confidence.
• Indicates decisiveness.

Disadvantages of being assertiveness

• At times if not properly conveyed, then one considers it to be rudeness.
• It can also reflect over-confidence.
• Can prove to be counter-productive.
• One may appear to be arrogant.

It is essential for a person to be assertive in one’s life or else everybody will trample upon him or her. One has to be firm about things and not give easily to everything that another person wants him or her to do.

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They call it a “pharm” party. No, it is not pin-the-tail on the donkey. Bored, in the mood to experiment, feeling like adults teens get together and put all the prescription medication they can find in the house in a big bowl and start taking pills. It is a “pharmacy” party and it can be deadly!

Teens’ testing the next new thing is not new; just look back to the “baby boomers” and their experimentation with LSD, cocaine, and marijuana. Self medicating with interesting plants and roots is as old as man. The rub, today’s “pharm” parties are likely to kill before the night is out especially it they are mixed with alcohol.

Teens know that over-the-counter medications and certainly, prescription medication have effects on the body. They know that most of the medications in an average family’s medicine cabinet have many potential mind altering effects. Little Johnny takes Ritalin for his ADHD and teenage brother Marc is pretty sure that if one is good, three or four is better. “Mom’s Xanax makes her mellow and happy, think of the high I can get. Here let’s mix them together, it will be cool” is truly scary.

All medications have effects. That is what they are designed for, to affect the person taking them in a particular way. Blood pressure medicine should lower blood pressure, anti-depressant should lift the mood, and insulin should lower the blood sugar. These medications also have bad or negative side effects even taken as written: sedation, nausea, confusion, lightheadedness, memory loss are just a few examples. Overdosing (too many) or mixing medications increases the risk of respiratory failure (stop breathing) and death exponentially.

Talk to your teens and be an example. If our parents take a medication for anything and everything a child will learn that this is normal. Normal means okay, okay means I can do it too. Is that the message you want to convey. Use medications properly, if one is good, two is NOT better. It is like speed limits, the amount limit is there for a reason and taking more is like running off the road. Lock up medications. Not a cheap locking drawer, a real lock to protect small children and your teens. Out of sight is out of mind.

Ask you’re teen why they want to get high? You might be surprised by the answers. The answer should not lead to a pharm party. Be safe.

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An athlete needs a person to guide him or her in order to win. The expert advice given by the mentor enables him or her to perform well in the sport. The team leader is the person who chalks out the strategy. For example, an aspiring tennis player seeks guidance from his or her coach, who has the necessary expertise to ensure that the respective athlete performs well.

Why a mentor?
A mentor is somebody who shares his knowledge and experience with the aspirant. He or she guides the aspirant to make sure that the aspirant performs well in his or her arena of work. Well-known athletes, actors, and even in the corporate world, one has a mentor to help.

What does a mentor do?

• Strategize. Chalks out a working plan that can hopefully ensure victory.
• Guides the aspirants.
• Shares his or her expertise and knowledge.

What qualities should a mentor have?

• Leadership qualities.
• The ability to guide the aspirant well.
• Expertise in the respective area of work.
• Knack for futuristic predictions.
• Should be able to assess what makes one win.

Benefits of having a mentor

• Chances of being successful are higher.
• Easy to win.
• Expertise provided helps one to reach the finishing line as a winner.
• For a beginner, it is as a stepping stone for a bright future.
• The mentor is a role model to emulate.

A mentor is essential in every sphere of work or game. One needs an experienced person to guide them well, otherwise it is difficult to win.

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Winning is a difficult proposition indeed. Everybody cannot be winner. He or she has to put in the requisite efforts in order to reach the finish line. One of course requires determination, will power and lot of enthusiasm to win the race or achieve the targets set. But that alone is not sufficient. One also has to strategize.

Most business ventures are based upon strategy. In fact, even athletes prepare their strategies in order to win the game. The leader of the team plans out what action a player must take. Every move is calculated. Performance of the athlete depends upon such strategic moves.

Even at the international level, respective governments prepare strategies to formulate their policies and accordingly act.

The purpose of strategy to win
Any venture one undertakes, one has to plan much ahead. Without planning one cannot achieve the requisite goals. For example, in business matters, the entrepreneur has to plan much ahead how he or she will utilize the resources, what kind of personnel to be employed and how to maximize profits with minimum investments. If one lacks in planning, one cannot achieve anything concrete.

Many business ventures lose out because they lack the skill to strategize properly. A good adviser can help the entrepreneur achieve maximum results. The adviser knows what are pitfalls and how to avoid them.

Advantages of strategy

• Targets will be achieved.
• Maximization of profits.
• Realistic goals can be set up.
• No wastage of money that is being invested.
• Can win over opponents.
• Will be able to cope up with stiff competition.
• Better utilization of resources.

Disadvantages of strategy

• Lack of flexibility at times.
• Improper advice.
• May not achieve set goals.
• Strategy is often based upon speculation.
• Risky and fluctuating market, which could mean that your strategy may not click.
• Miscalculation.

Strategies are essential to follow a course of action. They lay out guidelines as well as plan action to attain results. Without out planning one cannot be successful in life as well.

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Reaching the finish line is tough. It requires much effort. The desire and will to attain heights needs to be there. One must feel a winner.

But the question that arises is why win?

The motive behind winning
Being a winner makes one feel good. He or she is on the top of the world. Whatever one undertakes, one would like to excel in it. No one wants to lag behind. To win over others makes one feel triumphant and victorious.

If one loses out then demoralization sets in. In case, one wins then one’s confidence levels go up. One feels more energetic to do things. In fact, one feels like taking on more challenges in life as one feels that one can be a winner.

Benefits of being a winner

• More self-confidence.
• Enhances the desire to complete a task on hand.
• Willing to face competition.
• Proud of one’s achievements.
• Better self-esteem.
• More acceptances in society.
• Appreciation from peer group.
• Role model for others.
• Builds up confidence to take on further challenges.

A competitor would like to win. Whatever challenges he or she takes on one must be complete it successfully.

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A winner has to be motivated. His mentor has to constantly make him or her feel that he or she can win. Motivation is necessary to achieve a particular task. One must want to win. The zeal to win can make one put in the necessary effort to succeed over others.

How to motivate a winner?

• One must make him or her feel that he or she has all the requisite qualities to win over others.
• The mentor should boost the confidence levels of the person who is trying to win.
• The competitive spirit in him or her should be triggered.
• To win one needs to practice hard. The would-be-winner has to put in the necessary efforts to reach the set target. He or she to be motivated to do so.
• The drive to win is generally there on account of recognition or in the form of a reward. The winner has to be motivated to attain these.

Can a winner be a winner at all times?
A winner cannot always be a winner. He or she cannot take things for granted. He or she has to always strive hard. Any laxity can make him or her lose the race. In other words, he or she has to be motivated at all times to win the game or succeed in the venture.

Why motivate?
Motivation is the drive to do things. Without it one will not be able to reach their goals. A person often lacks the will to win a race. He either does not take the matter on hand very seriously or feels diffident. He or she has to be motivated by highlighting his or her talents and skills. He or she must be made to feel that he or she can win.

A winner is a well motivated person. He or she is full of confidence and knows he or she can make it ahead of others.

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We all like to win. Losing out means failure and failure can cause much disappointment and unhappiness. This is the normal reaction of a person who fails to win a race or game or achieve his or her set targets.

Winning means excitement, thrill and a feeling of positivity that even in the future one could be successful. Failure can lead to negativity as one would feel diffident about trying again. He or she may not be sure whether they would win again. Should this be so? Can one take advantage of failure and be a winner again? Why not? Let us express a few thoughts about this.

How to make a success of failure?

• One must take things in one’s stride. One must not give up but continue to persist even if one fails.
• Despite failure one must remain positive in one’s outlook. One must feel that one will win again despite the setback.
• One must learn from one’s mistakes. The same mistakes must not be committed.
• Failure must be taken as a stepping stone to win again. It must motivate you further to take necessary action to rectify the situation and thus be a winner.
• Failure is also necessary in order to know what success is. You can enjoy the fruits of success if you have experienced the hardships of failure.

Is failure inevitable?
In any venture or assignment one undertakes one does experience failure at times or is likely to experience failure. The fear of failure is always there. Failure is part of one’s life. We are not always successful in what we do, yet the setback we experience makes us perform better. Some may give up, but true winner will continue to make efforts till he or she wins.

How to overcome psychological fear of losing?
Often people who are less confident are afraid of losing out. This attitude can make them lose a game or nor achieve what they have set to do. One must not feel that they would lose and also at the same time not be afraid of being a loser. The fear of being a loser can lower their confidence levels. One must be sure of one’s abilities. Over-confidence is not advisable. At the same time one must be prepared for failure.

Failure must be a stepping stone to be winner. It must lead you on to the road of success.

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Many successful ventures have been completed on account of sustained efforts. Even in the sports and adventure fields, persistent efforts have permitted people to reach the zenith. Climbing Mount Everest was a difficult and dangerous task, but the climbers were winners in scaling it.

One has to be physically as well as psychologically prepared to be a winner in a given situation. For example, in sports one has to physically and psychologically prepare oneself to win the match. A boxer has to practice hard before hand itself and also be psychologically in good shape. His or her confidence levels have to be high before the match.

How do you prepare to be a winner?

1. Psychologically, one must feel that he or she will be successful. Diffidence does not help.
2. One must be prepared to work hard. To achieve results, one has to put in the required efforts.
3. One must be able to withstand competition. There is no point in running away from it. Competitors will be there in any field and one must take them on with a challenging spirit.
4. Study the situation well. Know all the facts before taking a long leap. One can step into a situation and be able to come out as a winner if he or she is understands the nitty-gritty of the situation.
5. Be psychologically prepared to take risks. One has to be willing to accept set-backs in case one is not victorious. Of course, one has to take many risks to be a winner as well.

One has to prepare oneself to be winner, both physically and psychologically depending upon the venture one undertakes.

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In 1967, the University of Minnesota started several studies of hand washing habits in the United States. They have watched us at a variety of public venues — theaters, State Fairs, concerts, and the like to see how many of us actually washed our hands after toilet activities. They found that men almost never wash their hands (11%) and women only one third of the time. In other words, we failed to wash our hands at all or we “rinsed” – the no soap method only. The good news is that we are improving over time, in 2004 men were up to 22-54% and women 50-78%. See which category you fall in as Mom says, “Go wash your hands.”

• Enter the bathroom, close the door (no witnesses), turn on the water for 3 to 4 seconds, turn water off, touching towel is optional and leave the bathroom. This is the old auditory signal to Mom. Not always successful for the tell tale mud still covering your hands.
• Enter the bathroom, close the door, turn on the water and allow the water to hit the fingertips of at least one hand for 3 to 4 seconds, turn off the water, dab dry. This is meeting the actual touching of water to fingers you deemed “truthful” when Mom asks, “Did you wash your hands?”
• Enter the bathroom, close the door, turn on the water for 3 to 4 seconds and actually place both hands under the water and perhaps apply some pressure between hands to accomplish some removal of obvious dirt. No soap engaged. This is most common, “I washed my hands” method for the majority of adults.
• Enter the bathroom, turn on water, wet hands, apply soap and scrub hands for 3-4 seconds and rinse well is the mode most people who deliver medical care use to wash their hands whether at work or at home.

If, we as a community really want to impact the number of shared “colds”, meningitis, or resistant infections we have to learn to wash our hands properly. We can take a page from the dentists’ patient education on how long it should take to brush your teeth. No, it is not ten seconds! It is two minutes which is why the battery operated brushes don’t turn off for two minutes. We need to time our hand washing to get it right. It should take 30 seconds to wash and 10 seconds to rinse. Time yourself! Most of us don’t come close to that much time. Over the years, I have heard two methods to time yourself most consistently for 30 seconds, they follow.

Turn on the water, wet hands, and add soap (now you can actually stop water) and while the scrubbing of hands, fingers and nails starts, hum the “birthday song” or the music from the game show Jeopardy. When hummed in their entirety they last 30 seconds. Scrub for entire jingle, rinse well and dry with clean towels or heat source. Clean hands are the results, not only from obvious dirt, but the friction and soap decrease the survival rate of those nasty bacteria and viruses that cause illness.

When to wash your hands is something of a dilemma for mankind as well. The clearly dirty hands need it but it is what we can’t see that might kill us. More and more infections are being passed on sports equipment: footballs, basketballs and similar. After sports or playing outside, we should wash our hands well and wipe down the balls and shared toys with a disinfectant. We don’t have to kill every bacteria or virus-diminishing the “viral count” is enough. Washing after handling food in general is a good idea but especially with raw meats. If you have a cold or other illness-sneezing and coughing spreads bugs everywhere-wash your hands often. Finally, how this all got started, wash after going to the toilet. All poop stinks-yours is not special or bug free. Wash your hands-it’s really not that hard. Be safe.

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In any professional field or in a business one has to deal with opponents who are trying to outwit you. Every individual wants to be winner in his or her stride. Whatever one may undertake one would like to excel in it.

How to be the winner in game of outwitting?

1. Adopt a strategy. The opponent is playing his or her own game. One needs to challenge this game of his or her by coming up with a better strategy that can nullify the opponent’s moves.
2. Never underestimate the opponent. Many a time you are overconfident and sure of yourself. This can end up in fiasco as the opponent may be smarter than you thought.
3. Gauge the mind of the opponent. Know what he or she is up to. It is good to gather information about his or her activities and moves.
4. Be consistent in your efforts. Any sign of taking it easy would mean your opponent will have an upper hand over you.
5. Be alert. One must be aware of what the opponent is up to. Never take the opponent for granted. He or she is always trying to find ways to defeat you.
6. Be confident. The feeling that you will be the winner come what may, will make challenges much easier to face.
7. Do not let the opponent know your weaknesses. He or she will take advantage of you. In fact, you must try to overcome your weaknesses in order to win.

To win a game or be a winner in a given situation, one must be able to challenge the opponent with full vigor. The strategy should be to defeat your opponent at any cost.

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